In a previous post, I explored how a seemingly harmless question, “How was your weekend?”, can unintentionally lower your authority in professional settings because of when and how we use it, not because the question itself is bad or inappropriate.

This time, let’s go deeper: the subtle language habits that dilute your message, weaken your presence, and make you sound less confident than you actually are.

The tricky part is that most of these phrases feel polite, friendly, or even “professional.”

But in reality, they are fillers, and even permission-seeking habits.  And once you start noticing them, you’ll hear them everywhere. We’ve been trained to soften our language to sound polite. But in professional settings, it often does the opposite. It makes us sound unsure.

Here are some of the most common offenders, and how to replace them with stronger, more authoritative alternatives.

1. “Does that make sense?”

While this sounds collaborative, it often communicates self-doubt.

What it signals:
“I’m not sure I explained this well.”

Say instead:

• “Let me know if you have any questions.”
• “What questions do you have?”

These assume clarity and invite engagement without undermining you.

2. “Kind of” / “Sort of”

Examples:

• “We’re kind of focusing on improving the user experience.”
• “This sort of helps with navigation.”

These phrases create vagueness where there should be clarity.

What it signals:
Uncertainty, even when you actually know what you’re talking about.

Consider instead:

• “We’re focusing on improving the user experience.”
• “This improves navigation.”

If something truly is uncertain, be precise about what is:

• “We’re testing whether this improves navigation.”

Confidence is about specificity, not about omniscience. 

3. “I just wanted to…”

Examples:

• “I just wanted to follow up…”
• “I just wanted to check in…”

The word “just” minimizes your intent before you’ve even delivered your message. You’re not “just” doing anything.

Say instead:

• “Where do things stand on [X]?”
• “What’s the status of [X]?”
• “Have you had a chance to review [X]?”
• “When can we expect an update on [X]?”

It’s the same message, but the delivery is stronger.

4. Overusing “Amazing”

When everything is “amazing,” the word loses meaning, and so does your credibility. (The same goes for “perfect”.)

What it signals:
Surface-level enthusiasm instead of thoughtful evaluation.

Say instead:

• “That’s a strong improvement.”
• “That’s a smart approach.”
• “That’s a meaningful result.”

Once again, it’s about specificity.

5. “How are you?” (in the wrong context)

There’s absolutely a place for genuine human connection. I’m not advocating for its elimination.

But in fast-paced professional interactions, especially when you’re leading, it can dilute your presence.

Instead of:

• “How are you?”

Say instead:

• “Let’s dive in.”
• “Here’s what we’re covering today.”
• “I want to walk you through…”

Warmth + direction = leadership.

6. “What’s going on?”

This puts the burden on the other person to define the conversation.

If you’re leading, lead.

Say instead:

• “What’s top of mind for you today?”
• “What would you like to focus on?”
• “Here’s what I’d like to cover. Does that work?”

Structure creates confidence, for you and for them.

7. “I think…”

Example:

• “I think we should move forward with this approach.”

Sometimes this is appropriate. But often, it’s unnecessary softening.

Compare:

• “I think we should move forward.”
• “We should move forward.”

The second is clearer and more decisive.

Use “I think” when you’re intentionally signaling uncertainty, not as a habit.

Why Should We Examine Our Go-To Phrases?

None of these phrases are wrong. The problem is using them all the time.

If your language is consistently softened, vague, permission-seeking, and overly casual, people will perceive you as less authoritative, even if your ideas are strong, because your delivery suggests that you lack expertise.

The Goal Isn’t to Sound Robotic

This is about being intentional, not about stripping personality from your communication.

It’s about being intentional.

You can be warm and direct, friendly and confident, and approachable and authoritative. The key is removing the unnecessary language that dilutes your message.

Authority is about clarity, which often comes down to something quite simple: saying what you mean.

What about you? What phrases do you want to put on the chopping block?